Categories
Personal

I broke my streak

This past weekend was the 4th of July holiday and an extra day off that my company gave us yesterday after the stress of the past few months. It was a much needed break.

I realized, though, that a break from work isn’t all I need lately. When I’m not working I’m typically on the same computer all day and night anyway. This is a pattern I have to break.

The first step to breaking this unhealthy pattern was to mostly turn off the computer over the weekend.

The second step has been to remove all non-essential apps from my phone, including the browser, as the phone has become my crutch whenever I have nothing else to work on.

Finally, I logged out of my two main social media accounts for now. It’s not uncommon for me to log out of Twitter lately. The network is so toxic that, for the most part, I can only handle it in doses. This time, however, I also logged out of Mastodon. While it isn’t nearly as toxic as Twitter I felt it was just time I took a break on it for a while.

So far the break feels great even though it broke a streak I had become proud of, that of my daily entries on this site. I’m back at that as of today but, perhaps, I should take more breaks in general.

Categories
Personal

July 3, 2020

I promised myself I would stay off the computer today but, here I am.

While it is a day off from work (the first of a 4-day weekend), the fact is, especially with quarantine, I can never seem to put the computer down. I pick up a book or a video game and, ten minutes later, here I am right back at the computer.

I know I’m not alone with this issue. There has to be better ways to disconnect. While “rules” work for me while traveling they’re almost useless during this time of quarantine.

Focus is just so hard to come by.

Given that, maybe it’s time to start gamifying offline time instead. It’s worked for me work walking, reading and other areas. I just need to find a game that will work for me with the internet.

Categories
Personal

4-day Weekend

Today marks the beginning of a 4-day weekend and, wow, do I ever need it. The meeting schedule at work has been seriously weighing on me and I haven’t written a line of code in over a month.

Here’s to hoping that things will start going back to normal when we return to work on Tuesday.

Categories
Personal

I wish I weren’t

The weather is here

I wish I weren’t

Yeah, that doesn’t rhyme that well. Oh well. I miss travel.

Categories
Personal

I’m ready to lose my mind

This is another one of “those” weeks where I can’t wait for the weekend. Of course, other than a long weekend there isn’t much to look forward to there either so maybe it doesn’t really matter.

My wife can’t sit still in the short term. Seeing her sit for even 10 minutes is rare. I can’t sit still over the long term. If I don’t travel somewhere every few weeks I get anxious and, I feel like it’s time to move after a few years. With no travel since March, and none in sight and after living in the same house for five years I’m ready to lose my mind.

Categories
Personal

It’s Hot

Summer in Florida is never fun. From now through at least October going outside is a miserable experience. It’s like walking into a running shower at all times of the day.

This is one of the major reasons I would love to move.

Categories
Personal

65 Days

Today marks 65 days of daily posts on this site. I didn’t know if I would make it this far and, frankly, I probably would not have had it not been for the lockdowns.

It’s no secret that the lockdowns have been getting to me lately but there are aspects of the changes that I really do hope will last even as the world opens up. Among these are habits I’ve built such as writing as well as generally doing more at home with less traffic for all.

Sadly, I don’t think this going to be the case. Traffic near me in Florida, even as cases of COVID spike, as at least back to normal and seemingly worse than a normal summer. That is not a good sign for our society and world.

Categories
Personal

Going Online

Since I was a kid downtime has always meant “going online.” From BBS in the late 80s to CompuServe and eventually the internet I’ve spent far more time online that should really be considered healthy and that habit has continued to this day.

As I struggle to find inspiration for hobbies and other fun projects I am sure this addition is part of the problem. If I’m not online I get panicky and feel anxiety that I might be “missing something” yet that is never the case.

It’s like I’m searching for answers and inspiration in the work of others rather than building services and tools of my own.

That needs to change.

The first step, today, has been in rolling back nearly all the apps on my phone. For 99% of my time my phone is nothing but a distraction. Travel is the only time I actually need the phone and, for that, I can configure it when the time comes up.

For my other time-suck, the laptops, I’m trying other techniques to make them less convenient including powering them down rather than putting them to sleep and more.

What’s the goal?

The goal is, as with many other areas of my life, to spend my time and energy more purposefully and to get past the burnout that has been plaguing me for quite some time now.

I have so many ideas I would love to pursue. It’s time to stop fucking around online and actually doing them.

Categories
Personal

26 June, 2020

I feel like I’m really at a loss for words these last couple of days. For that matter, I’ve been at a loss of just about all energy these past couple of days.

With the heat and the air quality I’ve just generally felt like shit. That doesn’t help with energy or motivation.

Categories
Personal

25 June, 2020

I’m running out of words today. Other than not feeling the greatest there really isn’t too much to say about it. Today marks 2 full weeks since I’ve gone anywhere and I’m just hitting a whole new level of “blah” about all of it.

I’m grateful, though, that tomorrow is Friday. The next two weeks are short weeks which should, I hope, help me feel like I’ve caught up a bit on life.